Now that I don't step out of the house a whole lot on account of my not having a job, I've been doing those survey-shits on Friendster pretty often. They really do help fight boredom, y'know.

So, Jay's done one that I did earlier in the afternoon, and that's not a common occurence, at all. I HAD to read it and was a wee bit surprised to find that in actual fact, we think kinda similarly. Cool huh?

Mine:

[01] Do you still have feelings for
your ex?
+ I have no feelings for him, that's
why I'm not with him

[02] Have you ever gave roses?
+ yep. to my mom, sisters, and Jay

[03] What is your all-time favorite
romance movie?
+ Notting Hill, I think

[04] How many times have you honestly
been in love?
+ I'm now in love, and it's my 2nd time

[05] Do you believe that everyone has
a soul-mate?
+ I believe everybody has a few
soulmates...somehow. Don't ask me why.
Haha

[06] Whats your current problem?
+ My backside too big ah

[07] Have you ever had your heart
broken?
+ nope

[08] Long Distance Relationships?
+ it's not too smart cos you can't and
shldn't trust the other party entirely

[09] Have you ever seen a friend as
more than a friend?
+ yes, as my twinnie! Haha. And some,
I see them as sisters. Oh, and Jay was
a friend first before we realised we
got 'something' going on. :-D

[10] Do you believe the
statement, "Once a cheater always a
cheater"?
+ I don't but the suspicion nvr goes I
guess

[11] How many kids do you want to have?
+ 2 or 3

[12] What is(are) your favorite color
(s)?
+ red and cream and green. christmas
colours! oh, and deep purple

[14] Do you believe you truly only
love once?
+ in my case, yes

[15] Imagine you're 79 and yur spouse
just died, would you get re-married?
+ nope, I'll just devote my time to
books and maybe writing

[16] At what age did you start
noticing the opposite sex?
+ my first crush was in kindergarten.
I even rmbr his name! teehee

[17] What song do you want to hear at
your wedding?
+ Love fool by The Cardigans,
Wonderful World by Ray Charles,
Waterloo Sunset and Everybody's Gonna
Be Happy by The Kinks and the list can
go on and on and on

[18] Do you know someone who likes you?
+ everybody looooves me!

[19] Do you like anyone?
+ I loooove everybody who looooves
me! :-p

[20] Are you currently in love?
+ obviously. teehee


His:

01] Do you still have feelings for
your ex?
+Definately not...

[02] Have you ever gave roses?
+ Yep, mostly to D :)

[03] What is your all-time favorite
romance movie?
+ Somehow 50 first dates keeps popping
up in my mind...i kinda like the
bittersweet ending...sorta...

[04] How many times have you honestly
been in love?
+ Twice...this my 2nd :)

[05] Do you believe that everyone has
a soul-mate?
+ I believe everybody has a few
soulmates...

[06] Whats your current problem?
+ Weight!

[07] Have you ever had your heart
broken?
+ Yep...

[08] Long Distance Relationships?
+ Yep, lasted for all of 6 months...

[09] Have you ever seen a friend as
more than a friend?
+ Yep quite a few...as confidants,
brothers, sisters and then theres D :)

[10] Do you believe the
statement, "Once a cheater always a
cheater"?
+ Nope...but then habits die hard
don't they?

[11] How many kids do you want to have?
+ 2 or 3

[12] What is(are) your favorite color
(s)?
+ Black, Blue and Grey

[14] Do you believe you truly only
love once?
+ Yep...and that true love is usually
your last...

[15] Imagine you're 79 and yur spouse
just died, would you get re-married?
+ Nah...most probably travel. YEAH at
79! Why not?

[16] At what age did you start
noticing the opposite sex?
+ 6?

[17] What song do you want to hear at
your wedding?
+ Now And Forever by Richard Marx

[18] Do you know someone who likes you?
+ I thankfully don't have a lack for
that

[19] Do you like anyone?
+ Course i do...

[20] Are you currently in love?
+ Of Course :)


Right, I hear those yawns.

Last tuesday, on the 31st of July, Jay and I met Sindhu, Suchita and Patrick for dinner and dessert. Nan was supposed to be there like an hour before dinner, but she appeared mid-waffle. *rolls eyes* After our meal, the 2 Ss and Pat needed to leave cos their eyes were starting to get that half-opened look. The rest of us, plus Nan's 'friend' Vel then hopped over to Thomson area for some prata and mee hoon goreng before settling down for a bit at Liquid Kitchen.

Their chocolate martini's not too good. I think they used Hershey's Chocolate syrup as the sole choco input. I no like Hershey's syrup, so I no like the martini. I am making my own when I feel like one.

Picture time!




Kudikaari kuppai indeed.


That's Jay and Vel. He's nice to bully ah! :-p




Right, change of topic.

Madhu's birthday party was last saturday, and we had it at a chalet. More on that later, but I shall post these 2 pics up cos I love them.





Back hurts. Period's on the way! Weeeeeee.

Toodles!

Deontology.

According to dictionary.com;

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
de·on·tol·o·gy /ˌdiɒnˈtɒlədʒi/ [dee-on-tol-uh-jee]

–noun ethics, esp. that branch dealing with duty, moral obligation, and right action.


And according to wikipedia.org;

Deontological ethics or deontology (Greek: δέον (deon) meaning obligation or duty) is "the theory of duty or moral obligation."[1] Deontology is also known as nonconsequentialism.

Deontologists argue the rightness or wrongness of an action does not depend on the goodness or badness of its consequences. In contrast, consequentialism holds that the right act or system of rules is the one that maximizes or satisfies good consequences as determined by an impartial determination of good and evils. Deontological ethics typically is thought to involve two important elements: prerogatives and constraints. Prerogatives deny that agents must always seek to perform actions with optimum consequences. Constraints place limits on what actions agents may undertake in an effort to bring about their own or the impartial good.



Isn't that frikkin interesting? I had no idea there were actually theories like these. Absolute ignorance, I know.

In case you're interested, here's more.




Deontological theories

The most famous deontological theory is that of the German philosopher Immanuel Kant. (I insert here, that's almost as bad as Gaylord Focker) In his theory, Kant claimed that various actions are morally wrong if they are inconsistent with the status of a person as a free and rational being, and that, conversely, acts that further the status of people as free and rational beings are morally right. Therefore, Kant claimed, we all have a duty to avoid the first type of act and perform the second type of act.

Kant believed that this duty was absolute. He drew a distinction between contingent duties, which only need to be carried out under certain empirical circumstances, and categorical duties, which always need to be carried out, because they are based on a priori reasoning about the general nature of things, and thus apply no matter what the circumstances are. Kant thought of the duty to promote human freedom and rationality as the only truly categorical duty. He called this duty the categorical imperative, and described it at great length in his writings. Of the five formulations of the categorical imperative Kant developed, the three most well-known and significant are:


-Act only according to that maxim by which you can also will that it would become a universal law.

-Act in such a way that you always treat humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of any other, never simply as a means, but always at the same time as an end.

-Act as though you were through your maxims a law-making member of a kingdom of ends.


Modern day deontolgists include Thomas Nagel and Frances Kamm. Of the contemporary deontological theories, Kamm's Principle of Permissible Harm has attracted the most recent attention, and is an effort to derive a deontological constraint which coheres with our considered case judgments while also relying heavily on Kant's Categorical Imperative. The Principle states that one may harm in order to save more if and only if the harm is an effect or an aspect of the greater good itself. This Principle is meant to address what Kamm feels are most people's considered case judgments, many of which involve deontological intutions. For instance, Kamm argues that we believe it would be impermissible to kill one person to harvest his organs in order to save the lives of 5 others. Yet we think it is morally permissible to divert a runaway trolley that would kill 5 innocent and immobile people onto a side track where 1 innocent and immobile person will be killed. Kamm believes the Principle of Permissible Harm explains the moral difference between these and other cases, and more importantly expresses a constraint telling us exactly when we may not act to bring about good ends—such as in the organ harvesting case.



Criticism of deontology

The most pressing difficulty for deontologist philosophers is justifying constraints. Robert Nozick famously points out what has become known as the paradox of deontology. If we are truly concerned about rights (such as the right not to be harmed in certain ways expressed by Kamm's Principle of Permissible Harm) then it seems logical we should seek to minimize violations of these rights. However, deontological constraints themselves prohibit such action. For example, consider a case where someone has maliciously sent a trolley hurtling towards 5 innocent and immobile people at the end of a track. The only way to stop the trolley and save the 5 is to throw 1 innocent bystander in front of the trolley. If the 5 are killed, this would constitute 5 violations of the PPH. If the 1 is thrown in the way, this constitutes one violation of the PPH. However, the Principle of Permissible Harm clearly rules out throwing 1 in front of the trolley. Hence the paradox. In order to respect the rights of the five, deontologists tell us we must respect the rights of the 1.


Many Act or Case utilitarians offer critiques of deontology as well as Rule Utilitarianism. Jeremy Bentham, an early utilitarian philosopher, criticized deontology on the grounds that it was essentially a dressed-up version of popular morality, and that the unchanging principles that deontologists attribute to natural law or universal reason are really a matter of subjective opinion. John Stuart Mill, who lived in 19th century Britain, argued that deontologists usually fail to specify which principles should take priority when rights and duties conflict, so that deontology cannot offer complete moral guidance.

Shelly Kagan, a current professor of philosophy at Yale University, notes in support of Mill and Bentham that under deontology, individuals are bound by constraints (such as the requirement not to murder), but are also given options (such as the right not to give money to charity, if they do not wish to). His line of attack on deontology is first to show that constraints are invariably immoral, and then to show that options are immoral without constraints.

Another, unrelated critique of deontological ethics comes from aretaic theories, which often maintain that neither consequences nor duties but "character" should be the focal point of ethical theory. The ancient Greek philosopher Aristotle, for example, sought to describe what characteristics a virtuous person would have, and then argued that people should act in accordance with these characteristics.


Also see, Notes On Deontology. - http://webs.wofford.edu/kaycd/ethics/deon.htm

-------------------------------------------------------------------


On an entirely unrelated note, I've finally gotten the pictures taken on our anniversary from Jay. The man was sooo lazy abt sending them over via the net, and he came over to my place with the stuff in a thumbdrive. Weirdo.

Heeere they are!



Lentil soup and bread. I love the soup tho it's not very delicious. Comfort food, sorta.

I love Sofra!


He's giving me a come-hither look while lapping at his soup. Mmm.


Oblivious to his intentions.


Analysing the Turkish tea cup thing while waiting for the kebabs.


THE KEBABS.

I LOVE SOFRA!!


They even provided us with weapons. Yet another reason to love Sofra.


He's acting all demure and shy.


Playing dead.


At Starbucks at Bugis Junction, the place we had our first drink together. He's making the Fresh Prince's 'i love you' face and he hates the pic but I love it, so here's a minute version. :-D


Thumbwrestling. The activity we indulged in first time we met too.


Blatant cheating.








He tore off the label on my shawl. Since I complained I wldn't know how to wash it later, he got a pic of it for my future reference.


Now you all know the shape and rough size of Jay's camera.


Same stuff.


Same stuff too.


Yeeeeeep.





I think his eyes look damn pretty in this shot. :-D

Mom's screaming.

Toodles!

I'm going to KL!!!!

Sometime between now and November, will be packing up to get on a very mini holiday at my cousin Sonia's place.

Probably going alone. Want to. Hope I can.

*anticipates shit from the parental board*

But I'm going anyway. Cos Sonia's going off to NZ, maybe even for good. Can't deprive her of my sweet smile, yes?

*anticipates a good degree of understanding from the parental board*

Besides, I promised!

So...

Hey! Guess what?

I'm going to KL!!!!!!!

I'm buzzin ah ah aahm buzzin, I'm buzzin ah ah ahhhhm buzzin.

I feel like partying!

But, I'm broke. Till the 28th by right, which is saturday. Knowing the HR manager, the pay'll probably be in only on monday. *rolls eyes*

And then, next weekend, is Madhu's bday celebration at the chalet. Sunday got prayers at Jay's place somemore.

I KNOW, prayer's at Jay's place, why shld that matter to me, rite? Matter of fact, it does. Know why? Cos I'm going!

Into the family we go. Into into, deeeeep into. There's nooo coming out, there's nooo turning back. Just into the family it is; into into, deeeeeeeep into.

*bats lashes at Jay*

So yeah, as I was saying, there is absolutely no space for partying till the 2nd weekend of August, which starts on the 11th. Friday = 10th August. Friday's a good day to party, no?

Who's in?

Happy Anniversary my sweeeeeeet!!!!

I love you, love you, love you and love you. And love you and love you and love you. I really, really, reeeaaally LOVE you.

I LOVE YOU !!!

Here's our poem once again!


And we two lovers shall not sit afar,
Critics of nature, but the joyous sea
Shall be our raiment, and the bearded star
Shoot arrows at our pleasure! We shall be
Part of the mighty universal whole,
And through all aeons mix and mingle with the Kosmic Soul!

We shall be notes in that great Symphony
Whose cadence circles through the rhythmic spheres,
And all the live World's throbbing heart shall be
One with our heart; the stealthy creeping years
Have lost their terros now, we shall not die,
The Universe itself shall be our Immortality.

-Oscar Wilde, Panthea

Thank you for the past 3 lovely yrs, and thank you, for the many yrs that are to come, which, I know, will be even more beautiful.

:)

Thank you for the background, my Sashiness!!!!!!!!

*does 23 somersaults*

And the party's going ahead well and good!!!!

*does 2,300 somersaults*

Oh, it's kinda final, I'm starting the course late September.

I shld have done it sooner, and I feel stupid saying this again, but I really shld have done it sooner.

But, like Kay said, there must be a reason why my studies were put off for so long, besides the lack of money; a reason for the lack of money, besides my family's(and my) financial situation; a reason for the financial situation, besides lack of planning. Actually, there can be no reason besides lack of planning. The planning sucked. Cos there was no plan. Oh well. As I was saying(initially), there must be some other reason that I cldn'tdidn'twldn't study till now. Like, it's all part of a plan, some sort of work of fate. Yeah I'm still wondering what the big plan is. Or small plan.

Will I really have a career that's related to what I'm studying? How abt the other stuff I wanna do before I grow too old to try. Will I do those, or will I just end up being boring and in other words, bored, and just die that way?

Oh well.

I'll be 21 soon. I'm officially not a young punk anymore. Must stop fooling arnd.

Doesn't that suck?

I suuuuurrrre hope we can work something out.

We're turning 21 together, ppl! Shldn't we celebrate together too? It's not a need, and is not meant to be proof as to how close we are, but it'll be special.

So, I really hope we manage to do it. Together. All 3 of us.

If we don't, though, we'll have to come up with something really really really mini for ourselves, just 3 of us also can. No 2 ways abt this; no arguements, no differences allowed.

:)

It's monday. Yet. Friggin. Again.

*dies*

Can't wait till I'm employed with a job that I actually look forward to. The day, will come for sure. But it's probably gonna take real long.

Oh well! Btr try catch some sleep before monday proper starts.

Toodles. :)

P.S: I got new glasses on account of my old ones getting lost on my way home couple of weeks back. Got nerdy ones! I look like a nerd and I quite like it. Like it so much, I wanna show you a pic of me in it tho it's disgustingly unclear.



P.P.S: I can't seem to tag on my own tagboard. Again. Mondays suck.

Wah knn, I slept for 12 hours straight ah!

Was online last night when Jay called from Batam. So, wanting to devote my entire attention to him, I peeled myself away from the comp and spread myself out on the floor. After the convo, promptly fell asleep. The mom found me snoring on the floor in a foetal position and sighed really loudly, which woke me up, and seeing that my comp was still on, I just switched the main power switch off and dragged myself to bed. That was at 12.30am and I awoke at 12.15pm today! Marvellousness, I tell you! I feel soooo fresh, and that's why I've chosen to blog since I'm not going out.

Also Sashi says she'll go on a killing spree if I don't get blogging soon but aaaanyways...

Yesterday was a pretty interesting day, in the sense that I met new ppl. But I wasn't supposed to at all.

See, work finished at 1, and I was supposed to meet Beeer at orchard at 1.30 pm but upon calling her at 12.30, I found she had some sorta change in plans and that she'll only be able to see me in pasir ris at in the evening. I don't mind changes at all, but her change in plans included the time, the place, the activity, and the company. So I was like okaaaay and decided to just go along with it cos I had no other plans anyways.

I knew I had a few hours to kill till evening tho, and was whiling my time away at the office, chattin and waiting for it to strike one when Krishna(the guy from the office behind) asked if I'd like to have a drink, since I've got the time.
We were supposed to have coffee a few weeks ago but it got cancelled due to me, so I said ok. Besides, I was glad I had something to do besides sleep in the toilet or window shop and end up spending.

AIYAH I AM SO BROKE Y'KNOW!! SO DEPRESSING!! IT'S ONLY THE 8TH OF THE MONTH!!!

Oh well.

Coffeebean was full, so we had some bubble tea at this small chinese shop, and I left arnd 3.

And then, I made my way to the Cheers joint at Downtown East where Beeer was waiting for me. Got a Jim Beam Cola (I. Love. It. Btr than the other versions) which she felt obliged to pay for cos she just got her tuition cash and went over to the beach where her friends were sitting arnd. Nice bunch of ppl! Hilarious too. They even had this weird point system going on so everybody kept getting 10 points added, or 100 taken away or 1000 added and whatnot. They're all as cuckoo as Beeer, which means they're as cuckoo as me, so I like them. Teehee.

Oh oh oh oh oh oh ohh oh. Pasir ris beach area got small small shops where the toilets are, right? We were at one of them, and I was paying for one of those bubble-blowing containers for the babies back at home when the shopkeeper, a chinese man, told me this; "You're very pretty for an Indian."

....

I was stunned for a few seconds. Then I said, "But Indian girls are pretty what!"

He replied, "But you pretty lah."

God.

I was, and still am, more insulted than complimented. I'm not being racist or mean saying this, but seriously, Indians have the best features. Indians, and Europeans, who often look Indian themselves, have the best features. How the heck can one be pretty for an Indian? Noone is too pretty to be Indian. Ignorant arsewipe.

Aaaanyways. Coming saturday, Beeer and I are going to the zoo. Care to join us? All are welcome, as long as you don't plan to wear neon colours. We don't wanna be attractions to the animals, instead of it being the other way round.

Time to do sit-ups. Tooodles!

I've not blogged for almost a month! I shld.

But this will not be a proper entry. Know why?

Cos it ends here. Tmr! :-D

It's 2.24am on a Tuesday morning and there're abt 4 and half hours left for the automatic alarm to ring. And am I spending them wisely? Nooooooo. But I don't do wisdom very well, so I shall excuse myself for a bit.

Y'know, I abhor getting my bills. When I'm in a good mood, I say that bills are to be thankful for cos they mean you've got a roof over your head, eat well, can afford to have a personal line, internet connection, etc etc. And in a crappy half-sleepy mood like this, it's like a huge cheebytic matter, even tho I adore internet banking facilities.

Money comes, money goes. But why the hell does it seem to be departing a lot more than arriving?

Currencies suck.

But I want money. Pls come to me? And bring your relatives with you. :)

Wah, I just typed my password out without looking at the keyboard! Not bad at all.

I'm jogging on saturday with the Kabbyness. I know, I'm still struggling to digest the fact that I, Dhanya Nair, will be jogging. At bedok reservoir too. The only place I've ever jogged/ran besides home(I go round and round and round like the Sugababes) is school, and that's cos I was forced to. In actual fact, I like running; it's just that after a few minutes of it, it starts seeming like a bad idea and I'd badly want to get a taxi home. Kabby'll probably be hours ahead of me cos she's got amazonian legs like my mom. You know, there's a lot of good genes that I didn't receive from that woman. Only got the teeth that jut out, a smile that's too big, the mickey mouse hairline, hair texture(which is actually not so bad) and good nails. Oh well.

Melinda's out! I hate American Idol. From now, I officially do, and I'm boycotting the show.

Ah, celery goes frikkin well with nutella.

There's this asshole who's been trying for yrs to get back with a good friend of mine, thru me. Keeps asking to talk to her and to be given one more chance. She, ofcos, doesn't want to; she's sorta engaged to somebody else, and besides, she hates this fellow. And he knows she's engaged and that she hates him.

Asswipe used to call me everyday to make small talk and beg (and to action abt how bloody rich he is) and later, it got to once every few days, then weeks, and now emails or messages me on Friendster once every few months to again, beg.

Here's the latest installment via email:

Hi Dhanya.I won't beat around the bush. XXX gave me 5 chances but i blew it.She waited for 7 months to win my heart over but now tell i've been waiting and will wait for the day she trusts me that i truely love her.I've been waiting for three years and i will continue to do so unless she's in love with someone else whereby i give her my blessings.She gave me so many chances when i didn't know the meaning of love and when i did understand she's not giving me a chance.

A.R ABDEEN


I'm so frikkin sick of this, and I've not been very mean(kill me), till now.


You mistake me for someone who gives a flying fuck. You can be dead for all I care. Since that's not immediately possible, just make sure that I don't hear from you again.


Dhanya

I hope to god that it stops him. If this doesn't, I swear I'm gonna hunt him down and stuff a broken bottle into his eye socket.

I'm blogging from work!

Yep.

So.

Toodles!!

Turn it inside out so I can see
The part of you that's drifting over me
And when I wake you're, you're never there
But when I sleep you're, you're everywhere
You're everywhere

Just tell me how I got this far
Just tell me why you're here and who you are
'Cause every time I look
You're never there
And every time I sleep
You're always there

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone
I'm not alone

I recognize the way you make me feel
It's hard to think that
You might not be real
I sense it now, the water's getting deep
I try to wash the pain away from me
Away from me

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone
I'm not alone

I am not alone
Whoa, oh, oooh, oh

And when I touch your hand
It's then I understand
The beauty that's within
It's now that we begin
You always light my way
I hope there never comes a day
No matter where I go
I always feel you so

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone
'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I catch my breath
It's you I breathe
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone

You're in everyone I see
So tell me
Do you see me?


Everywhere by Michelle Branch

I really, really, really need shoes.

I am amazed. I am not 'actioning', but a little over 700 ppl have viewed my Friendster profile from the April Fool's Day till now. Might be standard stuff for some, but this is a new record/madness to me. Proof!



Yet another screen shot. Wahaha. Anyways, crazy innit.

We all know that I, like every other girl with a Friendster account probably does, get weird/stupid msges. I just got this one that's icky and very to the point; "hi there... wanna have sex?"

Ewwwwyuck.

Oh oh, 2 interviews tmr, one courtesy of Kay, and another courtesy of Beeer. Wish me luck.

Nights and toodles!

P.S: I don't know what to wear! Damn do I need shoes.

Was out in town with Sindhu, Suchita and Sha wednesday night.

Mmm.. just realised; I'm the only one whose name doesn't start with an S!

Well aaanyways, I had fun and by the looks of it, we all did. With the slight exception of Sha tho. She had a bad day at work and she's ovulating and all so we sorta caught her in a cranky mood. After eating, she was as good as new tho! *sniggers*

Oh oh oh, we ate at The Manhattan Fish Market at Plaza Singapura, and I had the most gorgeous dish; Manhattan Flamed Prawns. The prawns were flamed right in front of my eyes (not literally), with a thick layer of creamy sauce covering them. And the butter rice was very tasty too. $16.90(excl. GST) but every cent was worth it. So much so that next time I go there, I might have the same thing.

After our seafood meal, our tummies were screaming in agony, but we headed over to TCC for dessert anyways. Sindhu and I shared a tiramisu, and the rest had a Dark Devotion each. Tis a good thing there weren't any guys with us cos if there were, the orgasmic, soulful groans that were let out wldn't have done them any good.

Before bingeing tho, we were at Orchard, and managed to get some neoprints taken! After so long. :-D Sha didn't join in tho, so it was just the sisters and me. Pic time!




This's the one I like the best!




Both of them look so sweet here, and I've got an evil smile on.




This one's not bad lah.



Honestly, I'm not in much of a blogging mood. I think it shows. My post's been as bland as Sanjaya's singing(according to Randy and Paula, if I'm not wrong), except for the pics, ofcos.

So I shall leave with the presentation(with a pretty yucky image of me) of this thingie I got via myheritage.com. It's a program that matches your features to celebrities. Highly interesting. If you're bored outta your skull, it's an amusing way to pass time.

Well, toodles then!

http://www.myheritage.com

You know that feeling you get when you're rocking your chair, go back a bit too far but catch yourself just in time before you fall?

That's how I feel when you kiss me.

You know how sometimes you crave for chocolates for days but have no time or money to get some? And one day you come home wanting only to go to bed, when you find a pack of Cadbury's on the table? The joy, the genuineness of your smile?

That's how I am every single time I see you.

You know how when a song you like comes on the radio, and you drop whatever you're doing, close your eyes and listen to it? And when it's over you get busy again but still wonder when they'll play it again? Cos that one time wasn't enough?

That's but a small fragment of how much I miss you when we part.

You know the feeling you get when you've been hearing about disasters and evil doings of man all week; that the world is a bad place to live in? Then somebody in your train gives up his seat for a pregnant woman and you think maybe we aren't so bad afterall?

That's how I feel when I hear your thoughts.

You're my exhiliration; my chocolate fix; my favourite song; my hope.

You know how when you're watching the horizon, you know that no matter how much you go towards them, the sea and sky will never separate? And that they will always be that way no matter how many years you live on; kissing each other?

That's you and I.

I'm 2.5 hrs into Friday the 13th! Hope it rains in the evening or later, to bring abt a Freddy-ish mood. Or maybe, the usual howls by the teens who're always hanging arnd under my block shld suffice.

Am up late! Cos, not working tmr! In fact, not working, period. Msg me if you're curious. By the way, I did not get fired.

The walls in my room are white. I've got built-in cupboards that take up an entire wall, and they're white too. My red metal double-decker for 3 takes up a wall and half and another wall is filled by my wooden-framed full-length mirror, brown chest of drawers, and short cabinet stack which is surprise surprise, brown too.

Can you say boring? I sure can.

I'd love to paint my cupboards first, but that'd require a whole set of new colours, which I can't afford right now since I'm living off whatever savings(if they can be called that) I got for the next few weeks. We do have an un-used can of dusty orange wall paint lying arnd that was supposed to be used to sponge a wall in the living room tho. I nvr got arnd to doing it cos I got too tired applying the base coat. Teehee.

So! I'll be doing 2 or 3 of my walls, and will leave out the one my cupboards are built on cos 99.9% of the wall's covered anyway. And, my door's a clean white, which will look real pretty against the dusty orange. Yay me! Too bad I can't do much to my chest of drawers cos they're plastic-coated. Oh, the mirror's gonna be painted too, to compliment the cupboards! And once it's all done, I'll take pictures and show my room off to you suckers!

*laughs evilly into the night*

Anyways, the whole point of going into such embellishments, will be revealed in the next paragraph.

Paintin' party, anyone?

If I were to die tomorrow, what mistakes would you think I have made?

What are the flaws you would find in me? Would you think I might have been alive had they not existed?

Would you think it would have been better if I hadn't existed, at all?

When you don't got it, you don't know what you're missing.

Where would you be now, if I never were?

Where would I be now, if you never were?

Just 20 years on earth. Are they of any significance?

It must be easier to not have existed at all. I guess I wouldn't be able to appreciate the simplicity/complexity of it all without having existed in the first place.

What am I here for?

What's your plan?

Emotions; responsibilities; bad situations; dire consequences. We made the world this way. We've established our general unhappiness.

The world should have been kept simple.