As much as the blame is mine, I will cry. As I love, and lose.

So, I can't stop tearing. This sorrow that I feel is only a little bearable. It isn't mine alone, obviously. But the pain I know, that's all mine. It's sort of filling up that bit of space in me that I've chosen to have vacated.

What's wrong with this girl? I know what's wrong. She's quite mad.

She took on more than she can handle cos she didn't think she'd have to be entirely ready for it. She thought all that mattered was that everyone else was. And that that's how it normally goes. She was so wrong. She wanted to be responsible, clear and marry the best guy she knew, and be a good wife. She kept it all inside, and got herself and everyone else in the picture screwed. And she is so sorry now. So very sorry. Sorry for the monumental fuck-up she created. And for all the hurt she's caused.

But sorry's no cure. Only moving on would work.

She'll move on, as he will too. She has to, she asked for it. She'll move on knowing that she might, or might not, have made the biggest mistake of her life, and that there is really no going back. There is no going back.

There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back. There is no going back.

There is no going back.