Scumbag blogger posted my draft. The post before this had initially been a shorter entry, which I'd tried to publish, but either my internet connection or blogger's server was faulty, so publishing failed. I then decided to lengthen the post a bit and saved it as a draft, and it somehow got posted. Even checked my blog right after signing out to make sure it wasn't published! Few days later, I come back and see it on display, embarrassing typoes and bad pic alignment shining in full glory. Ah well. Thank god I get almost no traffic.
I shan't use direct pic uploads anymore. So messy and difficult to work with, like Microsoft Word! Except Word is still better, since you can send images to the background so that you don't struggle with your text alignment like a rhino trying to fix a watch.
OKAY ENOUGH COMPLAINING, DHANYA.
Just had lunch. Nothing makes me consume more rice than sambar does. It's lethal, I tell you. Any previous efforts towards toning up/weight loss go out the window. Nevermind. I shall do at least 80 sit-ups today. And follow the arm-toning methods recommended by a cute black girl on youtube.
I'm a lot happier these days. A lot, a lot. Feel so much more at peace.
We're always told that our happiness is our choice, and that what you can't help, you gotta let go of. And it's always, always easier said than done. Which is why I'm glad to realise that I've done it! Now it's not really a cause for celebration, or even for that exclamation mark I used, but it's improved my state of mind quite tremendously.
I was never the sort of girlfriend to insist that my boyfriend kept me updated on where he is, whom he's with and what he's doing. I normally just get the info readily volunteered to me, or I ask him what he's up to, in the way of conversation. There's never a burning need to keep in constant contact with him, be it a long distance relationship or not. BUT, recently, I went over to the dark side a little.
Just last week or the week before, the bf was really busy with his assignments and stuff. Being busy is understandable, but what I couldn't understand was the part where there wasn't enough time to talk to me for days. I'm a firm believer of the view of that in a day that consists of 1440 minutes, one cannot be too busy for a 10 minute phone call. Unless you're unavailable, which is an entirely different matter; you're stuck in an island, stuck in a hostage situation, stuck in some other movie idea, or stuck in labour. That, I'd be stupid to bitch about. Anyway yep, I was trying to feel okay about it but was failing miserably and crying; crying cos I wasn't important enough, crying at the thought of him talking and joking with ppl around him but not with me, and cos I missed him. Also, I've some existing issues with regards to us, which made it worse. Then I did that post here on tips for myself to survive a LDR (2 or 3 entries ago) and went to bed feeling a bit better. The next day, I felt even better and now, I feel pretty good.
If a person who genuinely loves me says he's too busy and tired, I have to respect that and let it be. This is the guy who's been in love with me the past few years, and will be marrying me next year. I have to be accepting of such things, otherwise I'll feel hurt, which'll hurt the relationship, which's the last thing we both need, living so far apart to begin with. We've hurt each other lots before, and have made each other feel negligible, but we're still together after managing to talk some stuff out. I'll just keep that in mind, regard this as a non-issue, and be happy with all the time I have for myself, which I'm using these days to read a good book, talk to my mom, father, sisters and friends, make a pot of tea and watch tv, play with my nephews, and blog. I let the bf contact me when he's free, so that I don't keep checking whatsapp to see if I missed the alert for his reply, and to check when he was last online so that I can try imagine what's keeping him from responding to me. That's exactly the sorta girlfriend I never wanted to be.
He's noticed the change and he didn't sound too happy about it. I told him that not initiating contact is how I cope, and he understands. I think. This is temporary anyway. Marriage'll fix this.
And now, time for that pot of tea. :)
I shan't use direct pic uploads anymore. So messy and difficult to work with, like Microsoft Word! Except Word is still better, since you can send images to the background so that you don't struggle with your text alignment like a rhino trying to fix a watch.
OKAY ENOUGH COMPLAINING, DHANYA.
Just had lunch. Nothing makes me consume more rice than sambar does. It's lethal, I tell you. Any previous efforts towards toning up/weight loss go out the window. Nevermind. I shall do at least 80 sit-ups today. And follow the arm-toning methods recommended by a cute black girl on youtube.
--- emo-talk alert. ----
I'm a lot happier these days. A lot, a lot. Feel so much more at peace.
We're always told that our happiness is our choice, and that what you can't help, you gotta let go of. And it's always, always easier said than done. Which is why I'm glad to realise that I've done it! Now it's not really a cause for celebration, or even for that exclamation mark I used, but it's improved my state of mind quite tremendously.
I was never the sort of girlfriend to insist that my boyfriend kept me updated on where he is, whom he's with and what he's doing. I normally just get the info readily volunteered to me, or I ask him what he's up to, in the way of conversation. There's never a burning need to keep in constant contact with him, be it a long distance relationship or not. BUT, recently, I went over to the dark side a little.
Just last week or the week before, the bf was really busy with his assignments and stuff. Being busy is understandable, but what I couldn't understand was the part where there wasn't enough time to talk to me for days. I'm a firm believer of the view of that in a day that consists of 1440 minutes, one cannot be too busy for a 10 minute phone call. Unless you're unavailable, which is an entirely different matter; you're stuck in an island, stuck in a hostage situation, stuck in some other movie idea, or stuck in labour. That, I'd be stupid to bitch about. Anyway yep, I was trying to feel okay about it but was failing miserably and crying; crying cos I wasn't important enough, crying at the thought of him talking and joking with ppl around him but not with me, and cos I missed him. Also, I've some existing issues with regards to us, which made it worse. Then I did that post here on tips for myself to survive a LDR (2 or 3 entries ago) and went to bed feeling a bit better. The next day, I felt even better and now, I feel pretty good.
If a person who genuinely loves me says he's too busy and tired, I have to respect that and let it be. This is the guy who's been in love with me the past few years, and will be marrying me next year. I have to be accepting of such things, otherwise I'll feel hurt, which'll hurt the relationship, which's the last thing we both need, living so far apart to begin with. We've hurt each other lots before, and have made each other feel negligible, but we're still together after managing to talk some stuff out. I'll just keep that in mind, regard this as a non-issue, and be happy with all the time I have for myself, which I'm using these days to read a good book, talk to my mom, father, sisters and friends, make a pot of tea and watch tv, play with my nephews, and blog. I let the bf contact me when he's free, so that I don't keep checking whatsapp to see if I missed the alert for his reply, and to check when he was last online so that I can try imagine what's keeping him from responding to me. That's exactly the sorta girlfriend I never wanted to be.
He's noticed the change and he didn't sound too happy about it. I told him that not initiating contact is how I cope, and he understands. I think. This is temporary anyway. Marriage'll fix this.
And now, time for that pot of tea. :)
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